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Monday, October 29th, 2012
11:08 am

Hurricane Sandy
Ebbs and flows: rain, wind, then calm.
Quick! Go smoke a cig!

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Friday, October 19th, 2012
7:17 am

I like my paper
Like I like my women: three
Holes and in binders.

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Sunday, September 30th, 2012
4:46 pm - Grr

Hey, you - IBS!
Could you give me a break, please?
I hate losing sleep.

current mood: exhausted

(1 comment | comment on this)

Monday, March 19th, 2012
12:32 pm - Ode to Mitt Romney

Doesn't care for poor
For they have a safety net
But says he'll gut it

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Wednesday, November 2nd, 2011
4:29 pm - don't know why I have all this Cain angst

Cain's thoughts on abortion as stated to Stossel on Fox Business on October 11, 2011:

Abortion should be
Illegal, but it's not the
Government's business.

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Tuesday, November 1st, 2011
9:30 pm - Odes to Cain

Harassment of a
Sexual kind: not just for
Judges anymore.

999: fifteen
Syllables more to tell you
It's a bad idea.

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Friday, July 29th, 2011
5:25 pm - The driveway is clean enough to sunbathe on

Dear landlady: Will
I wash dirt off the driveway...?
...Which is ...outside? ...No.

It breaks my heart, too,
That the outside is tainted
With dirt. But still, no.

In the fall the rains
Will wash this dirt clear, and bring
New clean dirt in trade.

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Monday, July 18th, 2011
8:32 am

At the Russian store
The people are friendly when
You follow the rules.

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Friday, July 8th, 2011
7:31 am

Lock up your children.
Michelle Bachmann has spirit
of John Wayne Gacy.

(2 comments | comment on this)

Monday, June 6th, 2011
1:15 pm - Work ugh

Yes, you need I.D.
I don't make the rules, okay?
It's not personal.

If it was, you'd know.
I know how to make it thus.
I.D, or please leave.

I am not "unfair".
If I let you pick it up,
I would get fired.

You would be the one
who would be the first to yell
if I did not card.

So please, show I.D.
Without fuss or argument.
This is just my job.

current mood: annoyed

(2 comments | comment on this)

Thursday, May 26th, 2011
8:20 am - How's that study going?

Final: tomorrow
I don't know a Goddamn thing
Anatomy. Shit.

Like a boss: study
The red thing's connected to-
my wrist watch: mantra.

Can't stop refreshing
The internet: foul temptress
Ponies everywhere.

current mood: anxious

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Wednesday, May 25th, 2011
5:24 pm

We all join and post
just once. And then we forget
to write more haikus.

Are we just lazy?
A whole great big world out there -
so much worth snarking.

For instance, today:
I stepped in a huge doodie.
Clean up your dog's shit.

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Thursday, April 28th, 2011
11:12 am - Windy day

Please, my dear workplace,
Do not fall down on my head.
I still want to live.

Why are you shaking?
You are supposed to be strong.
Stop being so cheap.

You make me want to
find a nearby shelter and
hide under a bed.

current mood: shocked

(2 comments | comment on this)

Monday, April 11th, 2011
2:37 pm

"Aah, moving day," I
Think as I trip o'er a box.
"Where is my toothbrush?"

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Sunday, January 2nd, 2011
6:42 pm - I dare you

Go on, Mr Dick Face
Call me a cunt one more time
See what happens next.

current mood: pissed off

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Wednesday, October 13th, 2010
9:06 am

Christine O'Donnell
Is the new Sarah Palin.
Fifteen minutes, done.

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Monday, June 7th, 2010
5:44 pm

sometimes, always I
feel like the universe's
colostomy bag

(1 comment | comment on this)

Tuesday, March 2nd, 2010
5:57 pm

Great gods of Egypt
Why do you confuse me so?
Seriously, why?


God damn I'm horny
why must I wait a whole week?
fuckin period...

current mood: cynical

(2 comments | comment on this)

Friday, February 26th, 2010
2:51 am

You call that witty?
Cliche regurgitations
vomiting from you

Your college education
does not make you cool

The realization:
I married Holden Caulfield
Catcher in the *sigh*

(1 comment | comment on this)

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